https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/feed-back-my-first-lyrics/ Guitar Noise Discussion Board en-US Thu, 04 Jun 2026 09:53:39 +0000 wpForo 60 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/feed-back-my-first-lyrics/#post-165942 Thu, 16 Mar 2006 01:22:45 +0000 and soar today as opposed to repeating away, try to work out a couple more verses, maybe, a noontime nap, to beat the heat, a nootime nap, sucking the tv's teet, sorry bout that, couldn't resist, and i'm not sure if i'm on the path you started with your song, but keep writing.

marty]]> Sunday Songwriters Group sytys https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/feed-back-my-first-lyrics/#post-165942 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/feed-back-my-first-lyrics/#post-16272 Wed, 15 Mar 2006 21:51:43 +0000
here it goes

"
Sleeping days
Dust upon my face
sleeping days
oppressive lazyness

Why can't I
just fly away
vaporize the clay
and soar away

daytime sleep
a sheep more or less
daytime sleeps
a point beyond my reach

Why can't I
just fly away
vaporize the clay
and soar away
"
(c) Morten Karlsson 2006

It would be great to get some feed back (both negative or positive), or proposals to improvement.]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Zetterstroem https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/feed-back-my-first-lyrics/#post-16272