https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/ Guitar Noise Discussion Board en-US Thu, 04 Jun 2026 13:11:21 +0000 wpForo 60 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/#post-137038 Sun, 06 Nov 2005 18:33:57 +0000
There were a few words that didnt fit for me but it is probably just a matter of how different people will stress words differently.

I'm interested in hearing it. Would like to see if it sounds anything like what I was playing.

Geoo]]> Sunday Songwriters Group geoo https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/#post-137038 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/#post-137035 Sun, 06 Nov 2005 18:21:53 +0000 Just to give an example, it's not really about those girls.. You get what I mean I hope =P]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Karla https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/#post-137035 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/#post-136867 Sat, 05 Nov 2005 18:10:01 +0000
My thoughts on the last verse; it's a bit optimistic, I don't know if that is intended. This is probably just nitpicking (if that's the word...) I would suggest changing the last line to "that soundly sleeps inside". It's probably how I read it and me misunderstanding or just my pessimistic nature. To me, "you hide so deep inside" means intentionally hiding beauty, though to me, it seems the shallow people of the world couldn't care less about inner beauty. Therefore mye suggestion, because all humans are good, no? Beauty is there, it just isn't active.. (err.. active beauty... I'm laughing at myself now, I'd better stop)

Anyhey, I hope you figure out a way to sing it, I'd love to hear you

Good luck!

:)man]]> Sunday Songwriters Group manontheside https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/#post-136867 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/#post-136361 Thu, 03 Nov 2005 00:22:45 +0000 I've changed that you've fallen in love with yourself line
You're right about the singing though, I don't really know how to sing it, not only that lines you mention but the song as a whole. But I'll think about that. Part of the process too huh!]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Karla https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/#post-136361 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/#post-136113 Tue, 01 Nov 2005 21:49:07 +0000 This is good. I like the hook you've got going in there Stop the narcism
Start with realism Could be a bit tricky to sing though. I got this sudden rush of inspiration and wrote this song. That's really interesting, some of my favourite songs have been written that way, I guess by definition you can't manage and control, creativity.
This line: You have fallen in love with yourself When phrased this way seems a bit formal, so you could use You've fallen in love with yourself
Or
You fell in love with yourself Either would be fine.
The last verse completes the song nicely, well done :D

Cheers
Paul]]> Sunday Songwriters Group pbee https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/#post-136113 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/#post-12824 Tue, 01 Nov 2005 18:42:44 +0000 Here's my contribution for this week. I've been playing with this assignment quite long, but I really can't work with a concept or something like that. I've tried to make some sort of concept, but it just doesn't work for me.
About an hour ago, I got this sudden rush of inspiration and wrote this song. Initially I wanted to write about someone trying to get their life back on track after some serious problem. Wasn't too sure about what kind of problem, I thought I'd end up with a broken heart again anyway. But then I started browsing through some pictures I posted on my webspace and this lyrics just bumped into my head. The only rule I tried to keep, is using some scheme: starting and ending every verse with you. Don't even know why hehe
Maybe I'll get to record it tonight, if so I'll post a link here :D

Narcis
You keep staring at those pictures
As if they will help you
Coping with the rest of your life
You're living a lie

You've fallen in love with yourself
And don't even realise it
Finding love won't be a problem
You think you're the beauty

Smash the mirror
Tear those pictures
Stop the narcism
Start with realism

You gaze at the whole world
But refuse to see a thing
Looking only at yourself
You just don't give a damn

You think everybody loves you
If only for your outer beauty
Ignoring everything else
You live an empty life

Smash the mirror
Tear those pictures
Stop the narcism
Start with realism

You should wake up little girl
And open those pretty eyes
Learn about the true beauty
You hide so deep inside]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Karla https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/ssg3-wk5152/#post-12824