https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/the-fourth-a-combination-of-week-40-and-41/ Guitar Noise Discussion Board en-US Fri, 05 Jun 2026 08:25:18 +0000 wpForo 60 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/the-fourth-a-combination-of-week-40-and-41/#post-65965 Sun, 22 Aug 2004 21:33:06 +0000 Sunday Songwriters Group E.Sherman https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/the-fourth-a-combination-of-week-40-and-41/#post-65965 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/the-fourth-a-combination-of-week-40-and-41/#post-65927 Sun, 22 Aug 2004 09:52:35 +0000
I could post it in the general songwriting section if you guys think it dosen't belong.

EDIT*- okay so I checked week forty and it dosent fit. :oops:]]> Sunday Songwriters Group E.Sherman https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/the-fourth-a-combination-of-week-40-and-41/#post-65927 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/the-fourth-a-combination-of-week-40-and-41/#post-65925 Sun, 22 Aug 2004 09:24:33 +0000
Um, I'm probably just dense, but I'm having trouble seeing how this fits in to week 40 (a band, performer, or song) or 41 ( Multiple POVs, or inanimate object). Help me out here. It's an interesting take, and a catchy chorus, but it doesn't seem to flow for me, and I can't critique it in the context of those 2 weeks' assignments, because I'm not seeing it.

-- Scratch 8)]]> Sunday Songwriters Group scratchmonkey https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/the-fourth-a-combination-of-week-40-and-41/#post-65925 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/the-fourth-a-combination-of-week-40-and-41/#post-3236 Sun, 22 Aug 2004 06:49:40 +0000
She didn't stop to let me breathe, or give an apologie. :D

This is one heck of a bizzare lyric. It fits the music real well, and I'll probably record a little demo so you guys can hear.

Here's the story:

I was struck by one line last night: He left his spirit in the sand. In the course of writing what was supposed to be a song about a car breaking down on a trip across Death Valley, somehow it turned into a story about one of the wise men that went to visit Christ when he was born. Of course, there were most likley more than the cliched three, but I made up a fourth guy that didn't quite make it. His soul goes on to wander, and since he is no longer bound up in time, his story gets a little messed up, historicly speaking.

All in all, this song seems to leave itself open to alot of different interpretations. It turned out radicly different than what I had planned, but I'm all right with that.



Some of the song seems very tounge in cheek, and I need to work on this one some more, probably play up and make it more clear who it is that is speaking. But I figured I'd post what I have since the deadline is tomorrow for week 41.

Here ya go. The line spacing is pretty much sorted out into the musical phrases they fit to. Any odd spelling or punctuation is to show how the song is sung.

The Fourth

The star hung in the sky
The moon stuck low to the ground

We gathered up our things, made a prayer and a sign
Today I fell fine
Yesterday I was mine

Chorus
I've got two cups of water
And half a tank of gas
The sign leads the way
But I can't move that fast
I left my spirit in the sand and we
Went on to the Promised Land

The three that went with me have gone ahead
I thought I'd stay for awhile
Next thing I know I'm dead

My body-bag was clear so they could see
See what faithless-ness, has done to me
I saw the mountain didn't feel up for a climb
Today I feel fine
Yesterday I was mine

Chorus

If you could stay with me
Find my mind, floating in the sand
I'm drifting on… to the asphalt streets
I'm drifting on… to the smoking cars, and plastic candy bars
Is this the Promised Land?

How I wish I could've gotten to the star
I brought the gas but, I couldn't start the car

The man, the girl, the baby, are staying in the cave
I'm trying to run there, but I got my feet stuck in the grave
A special child
More dear to you than me
He came to save you, but you may disagree

Chorus…?]]> Sunday Songwriters Group E.Sherman https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/the-fourth-a-combination-of-week-40-and-41/#post-3236