Week 15 Social Butterfly ( completed ) - Sunday Songwriters Group

RE: Week 15 Social Butterfly ( completed )

BarnaBus RoX — Sat, 18 Feb 2006 08:55:40 +0000

Thank you Paul for your kind words

and your help

cheers

RE: Week 15 Social Butterfly ( completed )

pbee — Sat, 18 Feb 2006 00:24:17 +0000

Hi Hilch,
your welcome. I think the added dimension of involving you, gives the song more depth and makes it more interesting. Well done.

cheers
Paul

RE: Week 15 Social Butterfly ( completed )

BarnaBus RoX — Fri, 17 Feb 2006 01:02:36 +0000

Well thanks to Paul I really appreciate your time mate , I have the final on this weeks song ( and it's Friday Australian time ) just made it ..
Please enjoy

Social Butterfly

Verse 1

There you are smiling joking
THere he is drinking smoking
Your such the life of the party
He's so droll and such a smarty

Verse 2

Please let the children run
They just want to have fun
While their parents drink
And talk a whole lot of sh1t

Chorus

You've decorated your face
And tidied up this ol place
Balloons streamers everywhere
I really like what you've done with your hair

Verse 3

There are little groups forming
muisos talk about reforming
Your relatives are so boring
Your husband's in the corner snoring

Verse 4

Finally you come my way
I stutter stumble for words to say
Your rosey lips look so inviting
My heart is racing I'm feeling so exciting

Chorus

You've decorated your face
And tidied up this ol place
Balloons streamers everywhere
I really like what you've done with your hair

Bridge
Years ago I had my chance
I can't believe I saw you glance
Your eyes lighten up the skies
I never knew you were such a social butterfly

==============================

I would love to record it and play it for everyone but a couple reasons are holding me back
1/ Can't play
2/ Can't sing
3/ I'm haveing trouble from recording to exporting to MP3
I 'm not too concerned about the singing bit , I can always sing it in the shower :lol: :lol:

But honestly if I could actually play I would post it ( honest )

RE: Week 15 Social Butterfly ( completed )

BarnaBus RoX — Wed, 15 Feb 2006 11:39:14 +0000

hey thnks everyone for such positive feed back

L.K - good to hear from you again ( don't know how to answer your questions )

Paul - fantastic idea of changing the bridge to just the two ( her and me )

along with David's idea I will be working on it and hopefully re-posting before Friday .

Thanks again

RE: Week 15 Social Butterfly ( completed )

pbee — Wed, 15 Feb 2006 09:23:57 +0000

Hi Hilch,

Good to see you back. I think you're on the way to a great song here although maybe not in the direction that you had in mind. Verse3 for me is significant, cos the following bridge is where ( in my version of your song ) that she forms a little group (just the 2 of you) of her own while hubby is asleep. This really brings to life the last line of your chorus cos now we know that the 2 of you have been eyeing other up all night.

Sorry to hijack (I seem to have been quite critical tonight, must be a bad hair day) your song like that I just think it has such potential.

Cheers
Paul

RE: Week 15 Social Butterfly ( completed )

lotto king — Wed, 15 Feb 2006 01:29:04 +0000

Hi mate

There is some nice imagery here , and I agree with David on that little tweek but also there is some more tweeking I feel Hilch , I would like to know what are you ( the narrator is ? )

Your perving on this blokes wife , critising him , her relatives , whats your role here ?

All questions that I'm sure others will like answered

RE: Week 15 Social Butterfly ( completed )

BarnaBus RoX — Mon, 13 Feb 2006 03:42:27 +0000

Thanks David for your feed back

Sorry I can 't play good enough yet to post my songs as recordings ..

I am the worlds worst player I would never subject anyones ears to that

But thanks ...
The verse you mentioned I was singing it this way if this helps
There are little groups ------------ forming
Muisos talk about -----------------reforming
Your relatives are----------------- so boring
Your husband I think --------------he is snoring

Just take a little break between the lines I have 4 -4 beat happening with this ( is that right ? ) country music isn't that 4 -4 ? I'm lost to all that sort of lingo ...

Been playing it with D----EM----G----D ( and so on)
Bridge a little different with D7 and Am <--- is that allowed ?

I like your little tweek David thanks

I will make a promise to everyone in SSG as soon as I am able to actually play ( keep time ) I will record my work and post them as recordings . Then I bet the makers of ears plugs will have massive profits for the end of that fianicial year :lol: :lol:

RE: Week 15 Social Butterfly ( completed )

David Hodge — Mon, 13 Feb 2006 03:16:36 +0000

Hi Hilch

Welcome back

Love the idea and really like the bridge!

Some of the lines could use a little tweaking, rhythm-wise (or not, depending on how you can sing/parse a lyric). The last line on this stanza

There are little groups forming
Muisos talk about reforming
Your relatives are so boring
Your husband I think he is snoring

Seems a little awkward to sing, you might try

There are little groups forming
Muisos talk about reforming
Your relatives are so boring
Your husband's in the corner snoring

Looking forward to hearing this if you get a chance to record it.

Peace

Week 15 Social Butterfly ( completed )

BarnaBus RoX — Mon, 13 Feb 2006 01:54:16 +0000

Hey everyone have not been writting anything for a while been concentrating on learning to play rather then trying to write
( please forgive me )..I saw this weeks topic and thought of the parties I have been to over the years , and one thing always stands out . The wife or the female partner at parties becomes a real social butterfly
( thats a good lyric )

I call it

The social butterfly

CHORUS
Youv'e decorated your face
And tidied up this old place
Ballons streamers everywhere
I really like what you've done with your hair

VERSE 1
There you are smiling joking
There he is drinking smoking
Your the life of the party
He's so droll and a smarty

VERSE 2
Let little children run
They just want to have fun
As their parents drink
And talk a whole lot of sh1t

CHORUS
Youv'e decorated your face
And tidied up this old place
Ballons streamers everywhere
I really like what you've done with your hair

VERSE 3
There are little groups forming
Muisos talk about reforming
Your relatives are so boring
Your husband I think he is snoring

BRIDGE
Oh no ............
Someone mentioned politics
Oh no ............
Thats my favourite party trick

CHORUS
Youv'e decorated your face
And tidied up this old place
Ballons streamers everywhere
I really like what you've done with your hair

============================
Just wanted to get something posted this week and get back in the groove it's not exactly where I was heading but like always my demented brain kicked in and went down a totally different path that I originally was thinking of ...

Hope someone likes it if not back to the drawing board ...

All replies greatly apppreciated

Hilch :wink: