https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/ Guitar Noise Discussion Board en-US Thu, 04 Jun 2026 21:31:54 +0000 wpForo 60 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366483 Thu, 12 May 2011 15:50:06 +0000
Good start :D It looks very singer-friendly (and that's a good thing). A lot of good comments already posted.

Suggestion:

Since the 3 verses don't quite have a common ground, maybe you can make one like sequencing a day or day and 1/2 in someone's life.

I am thinking of Dido's song as a reference point
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFRm2srRC64
http://www.lyrics007.com/Dido%20Lyrics/Thank%20You%20Lyrics.html‏

....so in your song a possibility could be something like this:

Vs1 on the way to work

Vs2 jam session after work

Vs3 rendezvous after the singee gets off a late shift job

....something like this might also allow for a few choice details to draw the listener in a bit or add depth to who the singer is....but not too much info overload....simplicity seems to be a strength of this lyric at the moment.

Thanks for sharing.

James]]> Sunday Songwriters Group jamestoffee https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366483 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366482 Thu, 12 May 2011 15:11:32 +0000 I'm really thinking of slide on this, and I have a song lurking somewhere just outside of my consciousness for comparison, but I cannot get a hold of it!
And Chris, I at no time thought you were being mean. I don't imagine you have a mean bone in ya!]]> Sunday Songwriters Group katreich https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366482 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366477 Thu, 12 May 2011 06:23:14 +0000
Peace]]> Sunday Songwriters Group David Hodge https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366477 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366475 Thu, 12 May 2011 05:52:41 +0000

Darn it. :(

I completed the lyrics to "Surfing with my Duck" yesterday and I'd got half way through one about Fire too (that being where most of my sheets of lyrics end up...)... Guess it's back to the drawing board.... :?

Wait.... surfing... water.... Week 27... I'm back in with a shot. :D

As usual, I'm struggling with the music, but I'm determined to get something down. So it's back to plucking at "The Duck"...

Chris]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Chris C https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366475 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366474 Thu, 12 May 2011 05:37:38 +0000
Good to read this Kathy, and I can imagine a lot of musical possibilities to it so I'll look forward to hearing your thoughts at some point.

I'm on the fence as to the last verse. I keep thinking that it wouldn't be all that hard to incorporate music into it:

Well I see my baby smiling at me
When he comes through the door
Creating such a harmony
It's the song that I live for
It blows me away
Good Lord, it blows me away
The music that we make together
Oooh yeah it blows me away.

Not that I don't like it as it stands!

Looking forward to hearing this one when it's ready. And, as always, looking forward to more from you.

Peace]]> Sunday Songwriters Group David Hodge https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366474 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366460 Wed, 11 May 2011 17:50:30 +0000 "Incidentally, “surfing with my duck” also scored zero hits so I'm off to fill the yawning gap in the duck/surfing song market before somebody else does...."

Wow (%
I was immediately struck with image of a disheveled Brian Wilson in bathrobe, slippers and clutching a Rubber Ducky, lazily riding the nose while learning how to surf in his 60s :D

Anyone up for writing a Pet Sounds inspired song about that? :wink:

Ken]]> Sunday Songwriters Group CitiZenNoir https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366460 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366411 Tue, 10 May 2011 05:41:09 +0000
Believe me I'm not trying to be mean, the song is fine. As you know, I'm a big admirer of your song-writing and playing. Using familiar imagery about car radios and smiling honeys makes it very easy for the listener to tap straight into what you're talking about. That's good . Absolutely NOTHING wrong with covering them again, and again for that matter. Popular images stay popular for a good reason. I just feel that you could tweak it up a bit yet, and put more of your own stamp on it.

Take the opening two lines:

I'm listening to the radio
Riding in my car

I put this into Google: The phrase “listening to the radio” in quotation marks, and the word ‘lyrics'. That would narrow the search down to things with the exact quote plus a reference to lyrics. I got over 12 million hits. “Riding in my car” does pretty well too.

And none of those hits were for the opening line of Bruce Springsteen's song Fire:

“I'm driving in my car, I turn on the radio”

So I tried ‘lyrics' and “surfing the radio” that got less than 4,000 hits. “Surfing the airwaves” and ‘lyrics' only got about 500 (next to zilch in Google terms). Neither of those seemed to be quoting existing lyrics, but were mostly chat about the experience of listening to songs. ,“Cruising in my car” didn't score nearly as highly as “riding in my car” (thanks to the Woodie Guthrie song for a lot of hits there) and “lazing in my car” got an almost unbelievable zero.

Incidentally, “surfing with my duck” also scored zero hits so I'm off to fill the yawning gap in the duck/surfing song market before somebody else does, and before you start throwing things at me. :wink:

Cheers,

Chris]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Chris C https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366411 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366407 Tue, 10 May 2011 01:57:22 +0000
"Pop" has been almost a dirty word since the 70's - just remember, it's short for popular and there was a reason why it got that name.

Sometimes, bare lyrics on a page - or screen - can come across as a little cliched or simplistic. BUT....put to the right music, they fit perfectly. When you think of the lyrics of some of the biggest bands in history....try Led Zep (Stairway, to take just one example) or Yes or Genesis from the early 70's, or most of Rush's output. Ditto Dylan. Sometimes you just think, "What the hell is that all about!"

Then compare them with a song like "Love Me Do" or "Tired Of Waiting" or "Doo Wah Diddy Diddy" or almost anything from the mid sixties.....so simplistic, you'd think, "Jeez, I could have written that...."

I still love the early 60's pop music that was my introduction to music....Beatles, Stones, Who, Kinks, Hollies, Gerry & The Pacemakers, etc, etc, etc....always will. So do a lot of people - they were simple, catchy, singalong songs that stuck in your head. And still do. And that's why there are so many oldies stations still playing those songs....and probably always will be. Hopefully!

:D :D :D

Vic]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Vic Lewis VL https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366407 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366406 Tue, 10 May 2011 01:06:40 +0000 Vic, thanks for the thoughts. maybe we can both get over the slump we've fallen into lately. if everyday life would just stop getting on the way...... :roll:]]> Sunday Songwriters Group katreich https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366406 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366391 Mon, 09 May 2011 14:49:54 +0000
As Vic said, the switches didn't seem to be 100% comfortable though. It seemed to be all about music but then changed to being about your honey. It also seemed a little bit ‘white sliced' as compared to the tasty home made rye of some of your other songs - if that makes sense. A lot of the lines seemed reminiscent of fairly popular song images, which is fine, but it would have been nice to have had a bit more to chew on - some punchier phrases, more unusual takes on the images or just a bit more development of any one of the three different mini stories. Loved the chorusy bits but the beginnings felt like they could be juiced up a bit more if they were to really blow us away as well. Unless you've got some killer music of course, and then you can sing the telephone directory over it... :wink:

Chris]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Chris C https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-28-it-blows-me-away/#post-366391