https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/ Guitar Noise Discussion Board en-US Thu, 04 Jun 2026 19:56:56 +0000 wpForo 60 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-129560 Sun, 02 Oct 2005 17:33:02 +0000
Although the song doesn't quite fit the assignment, I wouldn't (if it was mine) try and change it to fit....I'd go with the original scheme....

Very good lyrics, get the point across without descending into self-pity... you come across as determined rather than bitter and twisted....

Good song, mate!!!!

:D :D :D

Vic]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Vic Lewis VL https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-129560 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-129303 Sat, 01 Oct 2005 04:00:31 +0000 Sunday Songwriters Group pierson https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-129303 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-129052 Fri, 30 Sep 2005 05:16:25 +0000
I guess I should be commenting on the structure and so on, but I just got blown away by the sadness of it and how much it meant to you.

My own Dad was a decent and well meaning man but rather distant, in the manner of many men of his era. At the time I often wished he'd be a bit closer or show more affection, or maybe just sit and crap on about stuff in a dad/son sort of way. But it's only now that I'm old, and a dad too, that I've started to understand a bit more about why he was like that, and what the things were that had killed some of his dreams.

If it's any consolation, a great many artists cite tough backgrounds, lousy parents, poverty (or whatever) for firing their desire to succeed and move away from where they began. I've even seen mock complaints from would be writers who lamented that their parents ruined their chances by being altogether too kind and too considerate. "How can I possibly be a serious writer when my father wasn't an alcoholic, mum and dad were happy together for years, never beat me or locked me naked in the winter woodshed...." and so on.

I feel sure those clouds are there for the touching. Keep stretching. And keep singing, in your own time. :)

Cheers, Chris.]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Chris C https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-129052 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-128763 Thu, 29 Sep 2005 05:22:32 +0000
What can I say? I cheated. lol]]> Sunday Songwriters Group pierson https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-128763 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-128758 Thu, 29 Sep 2005 04:52:44 +0000
I like the song . Most of it fits into 3/4 well.

I do find that I like the last chorus better than the others
because it almost fit 3/4 time but not quite.

Maybe you could try to edit the chorus with 3/4 in mind
and see what happens unless you have something in mind
to use a change in time signature.

Good Job

Celt]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Celt https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-128758 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-128757 Thu, 29 Sep 2005 04:51:31 +0000 Sunday Songwriters Group TwistedFingers https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-128757 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-12059 Wed, 28 Sep 2005 07:55:18 +0000
This song is about how I can't grow up like my dad. I went to see him this weekend and I refuse to grow up like that dipsh*t.

This Life
This is my last break.
This is my last fall.
I see what fate has to offer.
The path I chose is too flawed.
Life of my father.
I want to fall far from the tree.
Time to try pivoting.
I just had to see.

This is not the life for me.
This life will not give me the chance to touch the clouds.
This is not the life for me.
I can't just sit and watch the dying of my dreams.

I know what I can be.
And everything I can achieve.
My second voice can prove good points.
But I refuse to believe.
Life's ticking away
Days at a time.
Destroy the doubt that I create
And claim what is mine.

This is not the life for me.
This life will not give me the chance to touch the clouds.
This is not the life for me.
I can't just sit and watch the dying of my dreams.

I got to break out! I need to break this!
Before I freak out and then awake this.
I want you to give me back all of my energy.
The fog is cleared now. This is not the life for me!

This is not the life for me.
This life will not give me the chance to touch the skies.
This is not the life for me.
I can't just sit and watch as all of my dreams die.

Also, tell me if I should change all of the choruses to the last one.]]> Sunday Songwriters Group pierson https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/week-47-this-life/#post-12059