https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/ Guitar Noise Discussion Board en-US Fri, 05 Jun 2026 08:25:24 +0000 wpForo 60 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-376634 Sun, 22 Jul 2012 02:42:55 +0000
"Sat up, ate a nut sprawled on its belly
with cheeks of plenty, ribcages of jelly"

lines. That is SO perfect - paints a picture in my mind's eye, I can see it so clearly - which is what lyrics are supposed to do.

Look forward to hearing it!

:D :D :D

Vic]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Vic Lewis VL https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-376634 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-376600 Sat, 21 Jul 2012 03:55:54 +0000
The way the verses flow from scene to scene is very nice, but sometimes it seems that the lyrics seem to get a bit poetic (especially in the third verse) which makes them a bit of a jumble for the listener.

Maybe going from the squirrels' point of view might give it more of a lightness. Doing that in a purely descriptive voice would also be certainly challenging, but I think you could pull it off.

Looking forward to more.

Peace]]> Sunday Songwriters Group David Hodge https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-376600 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-376565 Thu, 19 Jul 2012 17:19:42 +0000
I wasn't at all confused about where this takes place because you explained it. But maybe a little more description of what the place is would help those of us who haven't been there.]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Hobson https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-376565 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-376521 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 23:58:37 +0000
Do you mean MALL or MAUL?

maul/môl/
Verb: (of an animal) Wound (a person or animal) by scratching and tearing.

mall/môl/
Noun: A large building or series of connected buildings containing a variety of retail stores.

I understand it better if it is "Maul"......I don't understand if it is "Mall"......if it is "Mall" consider switching it to "Wall"
:D

James :lol: Actually neither, it is the National Mall in Washington DC,

http://www.nps.gov/nacc/index.htm

I just got back from a family week of playing tourist there and these were based on three different actual squirrel and human behavior observations when walking between museums. "Maul" would definitely take the song in another direction beyond the assignment :o but we did wonder how the child in the second verse would react if encountering the more aggressive squirrel in the third verse. :shock: Thanks for the comments!]]> Sunday Songwriters Group andygetch https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-376521 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-376518 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 20:14:29 +0000 Sunday Songwriters Group John Sargent https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-376518 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-376508 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 07:25:22 +0000
Good job on the speed...I just now got out my guitar for the first thoughts for the week. :D

It looks like all sensory details....a line or two twisted for rhymes sake......Good job on sticking to the squirrels topic.....one point of confusion for me...........

Do you mean MALL or MAUL?

maul/môl/
Verb: (of an animal) Wound (a person or animal) by scratching and tearing.

mall/môl/
Noun: A large building or series of connected buildings containing a variety of retail stores.

I understand it better if it is "Maul"......I don't understand if it is "Mall"......if it is "Mall" consider switching it to "Wall"


Thanks for sharing :D

James]]> Sunday Songwriters Group jamestoffee https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-376508 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-43049 Mon, 16 Jul 2012 05:41:21 +0000
Refrain
Run, jump, twirl, chase and sprawl
Summer squirrels on the mall

Verse 1
Hot humid days in Washington DC
Tourists on national park property
Vietnam Veterans Memorial Wall
There a brown squirrel inside an elm's crawl
Sat up, ate a nut sprawled on its belly
with cheeks of plenty, ribcages of jelly
Repeat refrain

Verse 2
Cherry blossom tree blooms have long since gone
Scent of dying branches downed limbs were sawn
MLK memorial canopy
Second squirrel chased by a child of three
Yelling out loud you scaredy cat you
Childhood taunt natty-natty-boo-boo
Repeat refrain

Verse 3
Black chain-linked fence borders reconstruction site
At Madison third squirrel's patches of white
Foraging taken photo opportunity
jumped over the shoulder sidewalk generosity
No food given photographers walk away
squirrel chasing humans as they were the prey
Repeat refrain]]> Sunday Songwriters Group andygetch https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y10-w37-summer-squirrels-on-the-mall/#post-43049