https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/ Guitar Noise Discussion Board en-US Thu, 04 Jun 2026 10:15:57 +0000 wpForo 60 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384186 Wed, 22 Jan 2014 12:23:29 +0000
It reads well. I like the openness of not knowing what will happen next in the relationship rekindled :D

Thanks for sharing.

James]]> Sunday Songwriters Group jamestoffee https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384186 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384150 Sun, 19 Jan 2014 16:57:33 +0000
I like it a lot, could become a very catchy song! I am wondering about the factory gate. It suggest you are jumping ahead in time here, but in the bridge she seems to be a child again. Are you referring to schools as educational mass-production, child labor, or one of those freak occurrences which only happen in reality and never in song?]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Sunnydunes https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384150 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384140 Sat, 18 Jan 2014 00:11:04 +0000
finally getting around to looking at this weeks offerings. I like the song a lot and am in complete agreement with David with regards to swapping the "Lost love..." line with the "First love ..." line or alternatively a little variation like "Lost in love ... instead.

Good song
cheers

Paul]]> Sunday Songwriters Group pbee https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384140 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384122 Wed, 15 Jan 2014 01:39:06 +0000 Sunday Songwriters Group BarnaBus RoX https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384122 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384118 Tue, 14 Jan 2014 03:05:50 +0000
:D :D :D

Vic]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Vic Lewis VL https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384118 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384115 Mon, 13 Jan 2014 15:33:17 +0000 Yes I am here ( pokes tongue out )
I love the bridge - I read this an it was having a Beatles ring to it , maybe I am just weird huh lol .
Seriously great writing Mr Lewis]]> Sunday Songwriters Group BarnaBus RoX https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384115 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384113 Mon, 13 Jan 2014 11:48:33 +0000
David Cassidy - and the Partridge Family - were also played a lot. Strangely enough, whenever I hear one of his songs - "Some Kind of a Summer" - that does bring a smile to my face, even though that, too, wasn't released until summer '73.

:D :D :D

Vic]]> Sunday Songwriters Group Vic Lewis VL https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384113 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384112 Mon, 13 Jan 2014 06:43:24 +0000 Sunday Songwriters Group andygetch https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384112 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384105 Sun, 12 Jan 2014 20:17:02 +0000 Sunday Songwriters Group John Sargent https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384105 https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384104 Sun, 12 Jan 2014 19:48:26 +0000
And sorry I wasn't being clear. I don't think you should lose the "lost" line as much change it to the "first love" line. "Lost" certainly sets up the bridge, but the listener has no way of knowing that upfront and it might confuse the audience to get the great setup of the second verse and then wonder "why is it 'lost?'" Of course, that might be exactly the reaction you're after, so then go ahead with it.

Song's definitely a keeper!

Peace]]> Sunday Songwriters Group David Hodge https://guitarnoise.forum/sunday-songwriters-group/y12-w11-young-love/#post-384104