Time Travelers SSG 40 with MP3

Hi all,

This is a song I've been working on for a couple of weeks. A little more prose than poetic . . . . . but somehow I feel something is missing to make this song work for me. Just not sure what it is, so I could really use some help on this one. Thanks.

http://www.soundclick.com/neilstuart

Time Travelers

we are time travelers
traveling in our mind to a time where we are just happy to be who we are
like a star in the sky it doesn't matter why or what others see
we're in our own space and there's no race to go anywhere
we're here by ourselves and the vision that others might see
is a reflection and not really me

We are time travelers . .
Time doesn't change who we are what we see what we want ourselves one day to be
it just stands still, and it always will
a memory of a moment that we had in our grasp
a moment that couldn't last, now seamlessly part of our past

we are time travelers
but the time unravels right before our eyes and what we see dies
and the sun rises
and another day passes and we ask ourselves questions try to understand reflections
but we can't really see
and the sea crashes upon to the shore and there's nothing more
and time stands still and it always will
a memory of a moment that we had in our grasp
a moment that couldn't last, now seamlessly part of our past

we are time travelers
time just sits there to be used, sometimes to be abused
it marks our place and remembers are face
and records what we do and ignores what we don't dare to try
and it gathers the tears when we cry

we are time travelers
going from one place to another trying to discover
about who we are and how far we can go fast or slow
and despite all our fears we travel through years alone and together
through all kinds of weather
while time stands still

we are time travelers